[Intro]
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Right, right, right, right
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Somethings got a hold on me
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Right, right, right, right
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Sometimes I think pain is just a lack of understanding
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If we could only understand it all, would we feel no pain?
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God must feel no pain
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Somethings got a hold on me
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Only joy
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Does this mean even our suffering pleases him?
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[Verse]
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Lost in a cloud of marijuana
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Young Carolina nigga, fish out of water
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Step-daddy just had a daughter with another woman
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Mama aint recover yet
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Callin me at 12 at night
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She drunk as fuck and Im upset
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‘Cause why she always using me for crutch?
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Growin up I used to always see her up
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Late as shit, cigarette smoke and greatest hits from Marvin Gaye
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She kill a whole bottle of some cheap chardonnay
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I gotta leave this house cause part of me dies when I see her like this
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Too young to deal with pain
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Id rather run the streets than see her kill herself
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So ‘Ville became my escape from a feelin I hate
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Mama cursing me out
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Depressions such a villainous state
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I used to stay out later on purpose
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Subconsciously I was nervous that if I came home early then what would surface was her inner demons
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And then Id have to end up seein my hero on ground zero
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Tears flow while Al Green blow
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Love and happiness
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I wish that I could say the right words to cheer her up
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I wish her sons love was enough
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I tell her, “Mama, go to sleep”
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She tell me “Boy, hush. You better pray to God you never get your heart crushed”
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I shake my head in frustration
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Head to my room and I can still hear the tunes with my door shut
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Fuck it though, a couple more months Ill be gone
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Off to college and dorms
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Foolin myself, thinkin problems are gone
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But now its 1 AM and my mama dialin my phone
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I know she intoxicated and soon this high that Im on comes crashin down
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She lit, talkin drunk shit, Im pissed
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But Im still all ears like Basset Hounds
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Thinkin to myself, “Maybe my mama need help
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Dont she got work in the morning?
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Why she do this to herself?
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Hate how she slurrin her words
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Soundin so fuckin absurd
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This aint the woman I know, why I just sit and observe?
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Why dont I say how I feel?
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When I do, shes defensive for real
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Well maybe things get better with time, I heard it heals
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Little did I know how deep her sadness would go
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Lookin back, I wish I woulda did more instead of runnin
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[Outro]
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Somethings got a hold on me
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I cant let it go
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Out of fear I wont be free
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Somethings got a hold on me
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I cant let it go
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Out of fear I wont be—
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No!
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Somethings got a hold on me
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I cant let it go
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Right
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Life can bring much pain
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There are many ways to deal with this pain (right)
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Choose wisely (right)
