[Intro]
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“Or Eminem has a full line of chainsaws
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“Eminem, Eminem, Eminem, Eminem
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Eminem, Eminem”
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“Marshall Mathers, Eminem, the rapper Eminem”
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“Who can say for sure?
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Perhaps a frontal lobotomy would be the answer
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If science could operate on this distorted brain
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And put it to good use, society would reap a great benefit”
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[Verse 1]
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I walk around like a space cadet, place your bets
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Whos likely to become a serial killer? Case of Tourettes
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Fuck, fuck, fuck, cant take the stress
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I make a mess as the day progresses
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Angry and take it out on the neighbors hedges
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Like this is how Ill cut your face up, bitches, with these hedge-trimmin scissors with razor edges
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Imaginations dangerous, its the only way to escape this mess
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And make the best of this situation, I guess
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‘Cause I feel like a little bitch, this predicaments
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Despicable, Im sick of just gettin pushed, its ridiculous
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I look like a frickin wuss, a pussy
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This kid just took my stick of licorice
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And threw my sticker books in a picker bush
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I wanna kick his tush, but I was six and shook
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This fucker was twelve and was six foot, with a vicious hook
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He hit me, I fell, I got back up, all I did was book
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Now theres usin your head, momma always said
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[Chorus]
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“If you had a brain, youd be dangerous
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A brain, youd be dangerous” (Ima prove you wrong)
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Momma, Ima grow one day to be famous
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And Ima be a pain in the anus (Ima be the bomb)
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Ima use my head as a weapon
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Find a way to escape this insaneness (Momma always said)
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“Son, if you had a brain, youd be dangerous”
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Guess it pays to be brainless
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[Verse 2]
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Fast forward some years later, a teenager; this is fun, sweet
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I just got jumped twice in one week, its complete
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Its usually once a month, this is some feat Ive accomplished
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Theyve stomped me into the mud, gee
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For what reason you stumped me?
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But how do you get the shit beat out of you, beat down
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And be upbeat when you dont have nothing?
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No valid shot at life, chance to make it or succeed
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‘Cause youre doomed from the start
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Its like you grew up on Jump Street, from jump street
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But if I could just get my head out my ass
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I could accomplish any task, practicin trash-talkin in a trance
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Locked in my room, yeah, but I got some plans, momma
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These damn rhymes are fallin out of my pants pocket, I cant stop it!
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And Im startin to blend in more, in school this shit helps for sure
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Im gettin more self-assured than Ive ever been before
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Plus no one picks on me anymore
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I done put a stop to that, threw my first punch, end of story
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Still, in my skull’s a vacant empty void, been usin it more as a bin for storage
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Take some inventory: in this gourd, theres a Ford engine, door
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Hinge, syringe, an orange, an extension cord, and a ninja sword
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Not to mention four linchpins, an astringent stored
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Ironin board, a bench, a wrench, a ore winch, an attention whore
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Everything but a brain, but domes off the fuckin chain
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Like an independent store, somethings wrong with my head
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Just think if I had a brain in it, thank God that I dont
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‘Cause Id probably be Dahmer, cause Momma always said
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[Chorus]
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“If you had a brain, youd be dangerous
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A brain, youd be dangerous” (Ima prove you wrong)
~#**************#~
Momma, Ima grow one day to be famous
~#**************#~
And Ima be a pain in the anus (Ima be the bomb)
~#**************#~
Ima use my head as a weapon
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Find a way to escape this insaneness (Momma always said)
~#**************#~
“Son, if you had a brain, youd be dangerous”
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Guess it pays to be brainless
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[Bridge]
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Now my mom goes wahm-wahm-wahm
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‘Cause Im not that smart, but Im not dumb
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I was on the bottom of the pile, gettin stomped
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But somehow I came out on top
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[Verse 3]
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I told you one day, I said theyd have that red carpet rolled out, yo
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Im nice, yall, fuck it, Im out cold, now everywhere I go
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They scream out, “Go!”, Im bout to clean house, yo
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Im Lysol, now Im just household
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Outsold the sell-outs, freak the hell out Middle America
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Hear em yell out in terror, they were so scared, and those kids
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Just about belted out whatever spouted
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Or fell out my smart aleck mouth, it was so weird
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Inappropriate? So be it, I dont see it
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Maybe one day when the smoke clears, it wont be as
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Motherfuckin difficult, yeah
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‘Til then, hopefully you little homos get over your fears and phobias
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Its okay to be scared straight, they said I provoke queers
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‘Til emotions evoke tears, my whole careers
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A stroke of sheer genius, smoke and mirrors, tactical, practical jokes, yeah
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You motherfuckin— insert insult here
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Who the fuck woulda thunk that one little ole MCd
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Be able to take the whole culture and reupholster it?
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And boy, they did flock; cant believe this little hick locked
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This hip-hop shit in his hip pocket, and still the shit got
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That white-trash traffic in gridlock, shit hoppin like six blocks
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From a Kid Rock/Insane Clown Posse concert in mid-Oc-
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-tober, and God forbid I see a wizard
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And get a brain in my titanium cranium, yall
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‘Cause Ill turn into the Unabomber, Momma always said—
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[Chorus]
~#**************#~
“If you had a brain, youd be dangerous
~#**************#~
A brain, youd be dangerous” (Ima prove you wrong)
~#**************#~
Momma, Ima grow one day to be famous
~#**************#~
And Ima be a pain in the anus (Ima be the bomb)
~#**************#~
Ima use my head as a weapon
~#**************#~
Find a way to escape this insaneness (Momma always said)
~#**************#~
“Son, if you had a brain, youd be dangerous”
~#**************#~
Guess it pays to be brainless
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[Outro]
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“Insaneness” aint even a word, you stupid fuck!
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Neither is “aint”
