[Verse 1]
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Tryna keep my composure but keep getting closer to closure i leave when its over
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A colder demeanor when people approach ya
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A loner need noone to peek in your folder
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Only gone care when they carryin ya casket
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Hiding they love and they show it when you absent
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Die from a drug only then they call it tragic
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Nobody stop to think about how this shit even it happen
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Magic but yu was right there no prayers when im bleeding
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Everyone seem to disappear when you need em
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It seem that im grasping at air when im reaching
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It be mad dumb done caring im leaving
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Grieving but tryna be peaceful and smile
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Frequently high cause i need to be blind
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And be numb to outrun shit i easily find
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Questions and urges im keeping inside
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Like the purpose of earth and the meaning of life
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After birth we just work then we breathe and we die
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What the fuck is the worth im misreading the signs
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All the time you can waste why it need to be mine
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Pretend to defend your intentions
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Pretentious as friends get
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Endless no mention of endings
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Real bonds never break some of mine just be bendin
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The tension derived from all five of the senses
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Sick of getting burnt finna flip no burger
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Slippin and i skurt and i hit old mergers
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Digging thru the dirt but i get no further
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Still a word thatll get you murdered
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Say it like i hate em take a life
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Prayed and hoped throughout the day and night
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That i would make it out or god would make it right
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Tried to sell my soul the devil never gave a price
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Found it hard to adjust with a arm full of cuts
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Jus awful its rough when your hearts in your guts
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Plus loves as powerful and harmful as drugs
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Im partially nuts from the horriblest stuff
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What i went thru is marvel eventful and touching
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Fall and get up with no senzu or nothing
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I argue enough with you end this discussion
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I start to give up till i went and found something
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That paused all the pain
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Cooked i just look at stars and i gaze
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Thought it was great
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It was awesome
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Amazed with it all for a day
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But got lost in a maze
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Its hard to explain
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Listen i feel distant
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Dissing people that im missing
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Shit is different
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Whatd u do in my position
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Wishin i was non existent
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[Bridge]
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Love is a pain that you feel in your heart
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Its crazy the distance you teared us apart
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Screaming to god that your tired of trying
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What can you want when you dying inside
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[Verse 2]
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And dont let this get to yu
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But yu messing up my mood
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This depression nothing new
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Cant accept the fuckin truth
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Im still broken over you
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And i know thats no excuse
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My feelings wont diffuse
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Confused as what im posed to do
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Dude why do i feel like this
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Feeling like life is
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Pointless or priceless
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Thought it was quite rich
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Choices i might quit
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Caught in a crisis
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Flawed but im righteous
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Distraught when i write shit
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Ive been
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Been been
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Been at bat for blast for you changed for you jeez
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Never asked you to actually pray for me please
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But you make your mistakes and thn blame it on me
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Fake as tupees and its plainly to see
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Be catious w who u become involved with it cuz comes up often some will come up off you
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For every 1 that love u dozens cross u
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Maybe im unlucky never touch a horseshoe
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Fight cuz it ends so abrupt you
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Really want the last thing you said to be fuck u?
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Cool thas on you you gone deal with the pain
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When im gone and it haunts you to hear my my name
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And aint shit changed still feeling the same
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Like fuck it b what could be wrong with my brain
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I i warned u that im not normal
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Got no remorse but i stil got morals
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Opened my doors did more locks for you
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Sly with the gimmicks
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We could die any minute
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Its obvious i need a clinic
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Watch my sobriety deminish
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I finally admit it
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Pills had lessened my depression and regrets i just forget them
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Now im sober second guessing my decisions if theyre lessons
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Sections missing from my sessions
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I been distant just to stress it
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Sex is different turned a pessimistic
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Dickhead with obsessions
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Now im fixing my connections
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[Bridge 2]
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I guess im getting revenge try to even the score
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Plenty of friends you dont see anymore
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Going to war with noone on your side
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Sewing the scars you were trying to hide