[Intro]
~#**************#~
You fuckin groupie
~#**************#~
Pick up the goddamn phone
~#**************#~
[Verse 1]
~#**************#~
Bitch, where the fuck were you Tuesday? With who you say?
~#**************#~
I wasnt at the studio, bitch, whatd you do? Screw Dre?
~#**************#~
You went there lookin for me? Boo, that excuse is too lame
~#**************#~
Keep playin me, youre gonna end up with a huge goose egg
~#**************#~
You fake, lyin slut, you never told me you knew Drake
~#**************#~
And Lupe? You wanna lose two legs?
~#**************#~
You tryin to flip this on me? If I spent more time with you, you say
~#**************#~
“Okay, yeah, and Im coo-coo, eh?” — Well, screw you
~#**************#~
And Ill be the third person who screwed you today
~#**************#~
Oh, fourth—Dre, Drake, Lupe—ooh, touché
~#**************#~
You were too two-faced for me
~#**************#~
Thought you was my number one true-blue ace
~#**************#~
But you aint and I cant see you when you make that wittle boo-boo face
~#**************#~
‘Cause Im hanging up this phone, boo, you make my fuckin Bluetooth ache
~#**************#~
Youre feeling blue? Too late, go smurf yourself
~#**************#~
You make me wanna smurf and puke blue Kool Aid
~#**************#~
Heres what you say to someone you hate
~#**************#~
[Chorus]
~#**************#~
My life would be so much better
~#**************#~
If you just dropped dead
~#**************#~
I was layin in bed last night, thinkin
~#**************#~
And then this thought just popped in my head
~#**************#~
And I thought, wouldnt shit just be a lot easier
~#**************#~
If you dropped dead?
~#**************#~
I would feel so much, much better (better, better)
~#**************#~
[Verse 2]
~#**************#~
Think I just relapsed, this bitch pushed me over the brink
~#**************#~
Hop on the freeway tryna get some time alone and just think
~#**************#~
‘Til the cops pulled me over, but they let me go, cause I told em
~#**************#~
Im only drivin drunk cause that bitch drove me to drink
~#**************#~
Im back on my fuck hoes, with a whole new hatred for blondes
~#**************#~
But bias? I hate all bitches the same, baby, come on!
~#**************#~
Excuse the pun, but bitch is such a broad statement, and Im
~#**************#~
Channelin my anger through every single station thats on!
~#**************#~
‘Cause a woman broke my he-art, I say, “he-art”
~#**************#~
‘Cause she ripped it in two pa-arts and threw it in the garbage
~#**************#~
Who do you think you a-are? Bitch, guess its time for me to get the dust off
~#**************#~
And pick myself up off the carpet
~#**************#~
But Ill never say the L-word again
~#**************#~
I lo-lo-lo-lo… lesbian!
~#**************#~
Aaahhh! I hope you hear this song
~#**************#~
And go into a cardiac arrest, my lifed be so much better if you just—
~#**************#~
[Chorus]
~#**************#~
My life would be so much better
~#**************#~
If you just dropped dead
~#**************#~
I was layin in bed last night, thinkin
~#**************#~
And then this thought just popped in my head
~#**************#~
And I thought, wouldnt shit just be a lot easier
~#**************#~
If you dropped dead?
~#**************#~
I would feel so much, much better
~#**************#~
[Bridge]
~#**************#~
‘Cause you told me
~#**************#~
Youd love me
~#**************#~
Forever
~#**************#~
Bitch, that was a lie
~#**************#~
Now I never
~#**************#~
Wanted someone to die
~#**************#~
So bad in my fuckin life
~#**************#~
But fuck it, there’s other fish in the sea
~#**************#~
[Verse 3]
~#**************#~
And Ima have a whale of a time
~#**************#~
Bein a single sailor for the night, bitch, on a scale of
~#**************#~
One to ten, shit, I must be the Holy Grail of
~#**************#~
Catches, ho, I got an Oscar attached to my fuckin name (De La)
~#**************#~
I might hit the club, find a chick thats tailor-made
~#**************#~
For me, say fuck it, kick some shots back, get hammered, and nail her
~#**************#~
These bitches tryin to get attached, but theyre failin to latch onto the tail of
~#**************#~
My bumper, theyre scratchin at the back of my trailer
~#**************#~
Like Im itchin to get hitched, yeah, Im rich as a bitch
~#**************#~
But bitches aint shit, Id rather leave a bitch in a ditch
~#**************#~
Bitch, you complain when you listen to this
~#**************#~
But you still throw yourself at me: thats what I call pitchin a bitch
~#**************#~
Thats why Im swingin at this chicks on-site
~#**************#~
Long as I got a bat and two balls its foul, but my dicks on strike
~#**************#~
So all that love shit is null and void, bitch, Im a droid
~#**************#~
I avoid Cupid, stupid! Wasnt for blow jobs, youd be unemployed
~#**************#~
Oye-yoy-yoy, man-oh-man, your boy-boy-boys
~#**************#~
Gettin sick of these girls-girls-girls, oink-oink-oink
~#**************#~
You fuckin pigs, all youre good for is doink-doink-doink
~#**************#~
I got 99 problems and a bitch aint one
~#**************#~
Shes all 99 of em, I need a machine gun
~#**************#~
Ill take em all out, I hope you hear this song
~#**************#~
And go into a cardiac arrest, have a heart attack and just
~#**************#~
Drop dead, and Ima throw a fuckin party after this, cause yes
~#**************#~
[Chorus]
~#**************#~
My life would be so much better
~#**************#~
If you just dropped dead (I hate you)
~#**************#~
I was layin in bed last night, thinkin
~#**************#~
And then this thought just popped in my head (You made me like this way)
~#**************#~
And I thought, wouldnt shit just be a lot easier
~#**************#~
If you dropped dead? (Bitch)
~#**************#~
I would feel so much, much better
~#**************#~
[Outro]
~#**************#~
Im just playin, bitch
~#**************#~
You know I love you
